The loss of a childhood innocence
by Kyree
Summary: Ash and Gary's past
1. when we were little

Loss of a childhood innocence…  
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Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. (If only...) Nintendo, Creatures Inc, Game freak and all those other good people own Pokemon.  
Note: There is original charecter in here.  
This has nothing to do with the true storyline of the anime, but I tried my hardest to make it all compatible with the anime series.  
Tanx!   
-Kyree ^_~\/   
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[Narration: Ash]  
  
Prof. Oak always warned me that Curiosity killed the meowth, and that there would be some things that are better left unknown. I'd always jeer back that I was no meowth, so I'd be fine.  
Truth to tell… There are some things that will change your life forever, for better and for worse…   
  
I had a simple, somewhat normal childhood, for all that I could remember… playing out in Professor Oak's lab, watching Gary break everything of high value and Helping my mother in the kitchen.  
  
Mother was a magnificent gardener, amazing cook, and she did a terrific job for a single parent. I didn't know who my father was, though mother always said, "Your father is out there living out his dream of becoming a Pokémon master…" and every night, as I pretended to be asleep, Mother would walk in my room, kiss my forehead, and reassure me, and perhaps herself that "One day he'll return."  
  
I couldn't even remember his face, or his voice… of course, I couldn't remember anything before I was four years old. Despite my many unanswered questions I lived out every day like a normal kid.  
  
Mother knew Prof. Oak well, like her own father. She was best friends with Prof. Oak's daughter-in-law. Therefore, Prof. Oak was like a Grandpa to me. Heh, I was even entitled to call him Grandpa. I loved him like one too.  
  
Prof. Oak had five grandchildren, Gary, Gary's older brother Aaron, and his older sister, May. Then there was Gary's cousins, Kiriko and Satoshi. Gary, Kiriko and I were inseparable. We'd play all over the lab, with the Pokémon in the pasture and even in my house, playing Joe and Mac on the super Nintendo. We'd bike all over town, and do the shopping for mom and even Prof. Oak.  
  
Kiriko lived with grandpa. She had no family left except Grandpa and Gary's family. Her father abandoned her shortly after she watched her mother die. Her brother, Satoshi, died only two days before that night.   
  
Her father wasn't always the way he is now… from what I heard, he was a good man, who really loved his family. One day… he changed, and things were never the same since. He was abusive, beat Kiri's mother, and left Kiri and Satoshi to care for themselves while their mother was growing sicker from the abuse and stress…  
  
Kiri won't tell me much about her brother, not even about how he died… but she told me in detail, one night while we roasted marshmallows, the events and emotions that filled that horrible night she lost her parents.  
  
There was a huge Pokémon convention in town. Anyone who was a Pokémon trainer, or dreamed of becoming one someday was bound to be found there. Kiri went venturing on her own, with her fathers permission. She wasn't aware that her mother went in there looking for her. She told me it started raining, and when she went on the high hill by her father, she realized her mother was missing. She told me her father threw a fit realizing she was down there looking for her.   
  
Suddenly, as the rain grew heavier, and the sun had disappeared, all hell broke loose. Apparently, a terrorist had planted a large chain of bombs in the convention building. The agonizing screams of thousands of people and Pokémon were deafened by the ear-piercing explosion that devoured the building. Kiri says she heard herself crying for her mamma louder than the explosion. I believe her.   
  
In anger, her father struck her for the first time in her life. She was scared… the pain didn't matter, she didn't even feel pain… except the one in her heart that drove tears to fall as she looked up at her father, paralyzed by his glare.   
  
She said that she knows he's a good man still, because he cared for her mother that much. She also said, that after he muttered "sorry" softly, before he left her there, she could have sworn she saw a tear fall from his face.  
  
Her story was so upsetting, and her powerful, sorrow filled tears brought me down again. I cried with her. I still do…   
  
Gary's family also lived with Grandpa. Gary's family wasn't very rich… they often struggled with the rent, and hardly had anything decent to eat. Medication also pulled out chunks of money from them. Eventually they were left only the option to move in with Grandpa. Grandpa didn't mind at all.  
  
Gary's father was an alcoholic, and was abusive from the start. He called Gary "mistake", and never called him by his real name. Gary's mother was a great singer and songwriter, and spoke fluent Spanish. Her songs put you in a trance. She was pretty, and not just her face, her heart as well. She never had enough money to sing proffesionaly, and her disability made her greatly discriminated.  
  
May needed medication for whatever sickness she had. Back when we were little, we couldn't understand why it was wrong for May to have a baby at fourteen, why she needed medication for it, or what all the tears were for. What was this strange word they whispered among themselves? Rape?  
  
As we played everyday, and laid our heads in rest at night, wondering about what to do tomorrow, Aaron was hard at work with Grandpa, being his assistant. Gary often spoke of wanting to be just like his brother. Everywhere he went, everyone he saw, all knew Gary loved his brother. But when… it happened… Gary hadn't spoken his name since the funeral…  
  
He pretended his brother never existed, either angry, or too heart broken to realize he wasn't around anymore. No longer did he want to be an assistant. No longer did he want to take over the lab when it was time. No longer…  
  
Gary wasn't the only one to loose a brother… Kiriko and Gary tell me about Kiri's younger brother. She often speaks about how much she loved her brother, and I could tell she missed him a lot, because the tears that fell from her cheeks and landed on my feet were cold with agony, yet warm with anger.   
  
Funny, though… she seemed more like she cried out of frustration, rather than grief. Like he wasn't gone, but she couldn't reach him. Her tears fell, carried sorrow from her soul that cried out for him… I felt like I needed to answer them. Like as if… they were falling for me…  
  
I loved Kiri like a sister, Gary like a brother. Boy was I surprised to find out how close to the truth I was…  



	2. hatred

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[Author's note:]  
  
This is Chapter 2. This time Gary is narrating. Thanks for the quick response in reviews, to all who did. (that was REALLY quick.) Chapter 3 is already in the works. Please R/R this chapter. (oh, and about Ash's name and Ash and Gary's rivalry, it's explained in here.)  
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Years passed, and things continued to change. Most against our wishes. Ash, Kiri and I were eight. We were almost old enough to go Pokémon training, and boy were we excited as ever. I was supposed to be an uncle, but May suffered a fatal miscarriage. Not only that, but Mother's MS had gotten the best of her, and she… she's singing her beautiful melodies in heaven. And I know she's walking… iwalking/i in the clouds…  
  
Deep secrets that we thought we could hide forever started to surface, worse than before. I knew what happened to May. I knew what a rape was now… and I knew what a mistake was as well.   
  
Mother and Father would continue to fight every night, and one night, Grandpa had caught him. I don't know why mom hid her bruises, cause everyone saw them. Still she didn't tell. However, that one night Grandpa did catch him, Grandpa kicked the shit out of that bastard, and forced him to leave.  
  
I hated my father, and I wanted to see him dead. All I wanted from him was for him to once… just once… realize that I'm alive, and sadly, a piece of him. Something I vowed… I'd never become like him. Ever. After I got that stitches on my neck… after I came out of the hospital… I gave up. Now I just wanted him dead more than anything. And I wanted to see him die.  
  
Perhaps I wished too hard… I got my wish. I learned too young what they mean when they say, "be careful what you wish for". Kiri's father returned. He was looking for her and Ash. Grandpa forced Kiri to stay with Auntie Ketchum for a while, and advised Auntie Ketchum not to let her and Ash outside.   
  
When he couldn't get the whereabouts of them concluding that Grandpa was a bumbling old geezer, he turned to his brother… My dad. My dad didn't tell him shit either. Not because he wanted to protect Kiri and Ash… but because he always fought with him. Brother rivalry that went too far… and resulted in the death of my father.   
  
Kiri and Ash's dad escaped, and continued the position of leader of team rocket. I hated Uncle Giovanni. More than I hated my father. Therefore… I started to hate Giovanni's children.  
  
Ash was confused. Some things were easy to cover up… others were downright impossible. He couldn't understand why Giovanni was after not only Kiri, but himself as well. For all he knew, he didn't think he was Giovanni's child. All he knew was his father was a Pokémon trainer, and his mother was Delia Ketchum, and that he couldn't remember anything before the age of four.   
  
Grandpa was afraid that Ash might find out the truth… that Ash would find out that his real name was Satoshi.  
  
I mean, yeah, Gary's not my real name. My real name is Shigeru. I just had a hard time pronouncing Japanese, so everyone called me by my middle name, which is Gary. However… Ash's case was totally different. Satoshi, to him, was a totally different character. Not him…   
  
Ash didn't find out, and didn't ponder long with the question of why Giovanni wanted him as well as Kiri. I was so full of anger after my father's murder, I developed a horrible attitude, worse than just the annoying little boy Gary.  
  
Kiri decided to delay her journey, and left for Pokémon tech. She told me goodbye, despite my anger, and I dissmissed her. How I wished I hadden't. Ash and I became rivals, and I learned to get on his nerves a lot. When I saw his face, I became angered, not at Ash… but at uncle, because I saw Uncle's face in his.   
  
We became rather distant, and upset, Ash stopped calling Grandpa as his own Grandpa. Grandpa wasn't proud of my recent attitude. Auntie Ketchum wasn't aware of it. Ash didn't make a big deal of it to anyone but himself and I. Every time I did upset him, I cried while no one watched. I was beginning to hate myself, despite the egotistical front I put up.  
  
Two years later, we left on our Pokémon Journeys…  
  
  
TO BE CONTINUED… CHAPTER 3 COMING SOON.  
  



	3. Pokemon Tech

  
  
  
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Author's note  
Thanx again 4 the responses! ^_^  
Kiri's turn to narrate!  
Oh, and something else… people are speculating about Kiri being Jessie/Musashi? You'll have to read on to find out more. (The story is gonna slowly pick up a science-fiction slight x-files demeanor. It will still keep it's typical drama front, though, mind you!) and I might have to change this fic to an R rating. All well… we'll see, ne? ^_^  
Oh, there's a mentioning of Tenchi Muyo in here. Another disclaimer: I DON'T OWN TENCHI MUYO! ^_^  
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I was disappointed that I couldn't see Ash and Gary leave on their big day they became licensed Pokémon trainers. But somewhat inside, I was glad I wasn't there, because watching those two bicker at eachother was not only in my mind senseless, but it hurt to watch them.  
  
Pokémon tech wasn't what I thought it would be. It was a hell-hole, covered by a fancy name. It was pretty much full of snot-faced little discriminatory brats who'd go out on a limb to see a tear fall down someone's face.   
  
I did, however, meet someone that wasn't like the rest. He still had spunk, but he had a good heart. I could tell it from his aura. His name, he said, was Kojiro James Morgan. I still couldn't believe that this rebellious bunch of kid was the son of the famous snot-nosed millionaire who had a huge estate sitting on the top of Sunny town.   
  
What I meant by "still" was that I also couldn't believe it was the same young man who I remember playing with before my mamma died. His father had some kind of connection with my father. Probably something to do with team rocket. He hardly changed, he was still the same Kojiro I remembered sharing chocolate ice cream cones, lolli-pops and strawberry sodas with. I didn't see anything wrong with it, nor did I know what hygiene was, but he didn't slobber, so I didn't see a problem.  
  
Then there was Jess. Gawd, she got on my nerves… and yet if a snorlax were gonna sit on her and squish her to death, I'd try to stop it… though I'd never admit to it. Her and I were complete opposites. Her family was poor. She was so vain, I hated myself. She wore that fancy, expensive make-up, I only used the some-what outrageous, glittery kind. I used it only in self-expression, not self-improvement.   
  
There were some things that we had in common, though… Jess was totally head-over-heals for Kojiro… So was I. That didn't help to our "friendship" and the fact that Kojiro and I were close didn't help either. I suppose you could say that Jess and I were the Ayeka and Ryoko of Pokémon Tech. (I loved that Tenchi show. I watched it after Pokémon battle technique class!)   
  
Jess' mother used to work for team rocket. She died on a mission, however. Jessie never knew who her dad was. It's like her mom wasn't even married. After her mother died, she was taken in by Boss Lady. Boss Lady was the only name she went by. She was the original leader of team rocket. She couldn't take over after her heart attack, and my father was in charge. If you don't get it by now… Boss Lady is my Grandmother.  
  
Jess and I totally clashed… but it was weird… it was like she was the part of me that was missing…   
  
I constantly e-mailed Ash and Gary, trying to keep up with were they were. I marked off their locations with a map I had in my Pokemon Geographical location and Habitat class. Gary still cracked jokes about Ash and I as awlays, complaining that I bugged him with e-mail too much. Ash had met up with these people named Brock and Misty. He seemed to be haing fun. that was good. I had the strange feeling in my gut, though, that my little brother had the hots for this misty girl.  
  
Days passed by, and the harassment grew stronger. Still, after class, Koji would wipe away the tears, give me a hug, then offer his pudding to me as we ate lunch. We always ended up sharing it. Jess picked on me, true, but not when it came to the harassment. It only got worse, and my sensitivity grew more tense. One day, I finally cracked. In Pokémon biology class, I snapped when the teacher belittled me into such a position where I lost my touch with reality and silenced the laughing class when I began to curse words I'd never said in my life.   
  
A student tried to knock me out after cursing back that Grandpa was… I rather not say… But Koji blocked the hit and knocked him back. Blood spilled… Security dragged Koji and I out of the class room. The boy wasn't scolded. He was "acting in self defense" because Koji and I double teamed him for "No reason", which was confirmed by the teacher and students in that class. They were all a bunch of back-stabbing bastards. That's all. Bastards...  
  
  
  
  
  
CHAPTER 4 COMING SOON  



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